We took Alfie back on Friday morning. It was horrible. We still didn't really know if we were making the right decision and took it in turns to cry as we drove the 2 hour journey up to Cambridgeshire to drop him off. We kept looking at each other and saying 'what are we doing?' and when we got there it was horrendous. Ros, the lady there asked us if we were making the right decision and we just had to say we didn't know.
Alfie wasn't too bothered, he was happy to see the rescue staff again and wagged his tail and then walked off without a care in the world. We could hear dogs barking and howling as we walked back to the car and imagined each howl to be him and it just hurt.
Once back in the car, Rob broke down and said he really hadn't thought we were going to do it. If only I'd known how close he was to not doing it and I'd have put my foot down and turned us back. We took it in turns to cry all the way home.
The house seemed so quiet and empty when we got home. Alfies toys were still on the lawn and his dog bowl on the floor in the kitchen. I just broke down and sobbed my heart out. And then did the same at various points over the weekend.
We still don't know if we have made the right decision. He was the perfect dog in so many ways and any other dog we get will have problems of some sort. Could we have knuckled down and trained Alfie? Could we have worked through the care options for him? Could we have worked through the separation anxiety? The questions don't get any easier and linger.
No comments:
Post a Comment